The Blur

The blur of pain, sleep, feedings, hospital visits, emotional breakdowns, drugs, etc.

A C-section sure is way, way harder to get over than a vaginal birth. Ick. Plus coming off of bed rest for four months left me with swollen limbs and a headache every time I stand up for too long.

A few days after I got home from the hospital I realized I had this crushing headache that was just getting worse and worse. Eventually I couldn't even stand up because of the pain. Apparently my epidural had left a little hole in my spinal cord. It happens sometimes. So I spent an afternoon at the hospital getting a "blood patch" (they took my blood out of my arm and injected it near the epidural so that the blood would clot and help me heal).

Then at Sammy's first doctor's appointment I had a little emotional breakdown that freaked all the nurses and doctors out and was totally humiliating. Just minutes before, the doctor had been lecturing me about how normal hormone fluctuations are - so why did she freak out when I burst into tears at the thought of taking Samuel back to the hospital to have his Billirueben tested? (Which, by the way, was totally fine.)

Richard and my Dad have both also had health issues this week that have sent them to the doctors. And the boys had their routine check ups. So nearly everybody has seen a doctor this week. Sheesh.

About a week after being born Samuel realized there was an option other than sleep or eat. He opened his eyes a little more often and started having some awake time. He is still totally cute and perfect. No change there!

I am finally feeling like maybe there is a way I can handle this on my own. Which is good since my parents go back to their house in far, far away Texas tomorrow. *sigh* Can't they stay and take care of us forever?