Tuesday, August 18, 2009


Yep. Apraxia. That's what the Speech Therapist says it seems like Isaiah has. She didn't actually diagnose him - it's apparently too early for that still - but that's what it looks like. A website I found says about Apraxia: "Your two-year-old says no words, makes some sounds, yet he understands everything you say." Yep. Right on. "Childhood Apraxia of Speech is a deficit in the ability to plan the motor movements for speech and is considered an oral motor planning disorder. Children with CAS have difficulties transmitting the speech message from their brain to their mouths." Basically, speech is just harder for him than for us. The Speech Therapist says this might just mean it's harder for him to learn to speak, or it might mean he'll never quite learn. In really bad cases, these kids never speak.

I don't really know how to feel about this. I am mostly optimistic. He's a smart boy - really, I think he's above average intelligence. So maybe with a few years of speech therapy he'll be fine. Or maybe (like Ang was telling me about somebody-er-other) he'll always talk a little funny but it'll just be kinda like he has an accent. Or maybe we all need to get serious about learning sign language because that's the only way he'll ever be able to really talk to us. Maybe I'll never hear Isaiah walk in the door and say "Hi, Mom! I'm home!"

You can see how quickly I go from "optimistic" to "dooms day".

I refuse to Google Apraxia anymore. It's not helping. For now I will wait for my Sept. 10 appointment when (I am now confident) they will tell me that Isaiah has been approved for State-funded speech therapy. And hopefully the actual therapy will start very soon thereafter. Maybe Isaiah will be basically starting school along with his big sister and brother.

There's a lot of maybes. Too many for a good nights sleep if I start thinking about them.


Kelly Jo said...

One of the first things we tell our parents when we give them a new diagnosis is "try not to search the internet about this. If you have questions, ask us and we'll give you information or recommend quality literature about it." We know they always look, but it's almost impossible not to, but it can also drive you crazy and give you bad info. . .Anyway, one day at a time and information/a diagnosis is power, it means you have a direction to go in. It's still hard though and quite normal to go from optimistic to dooms day. . .

Elieson Family said...

I don't know Kelly Jo, but I quite agree. Think of the time when you were waiting to receive your mission call: you had your papers in, you were primed and ready, decision was made, and the WAITING to find out was the worst. Once you knew - you had direction, a goal.
Wish Isaiah, you now have a goal. You have a focus for your energy, anxiety, talents etc. And REGARDLESS of what exactly the future holds for Isaiah, you both will still go through life with challenges like everyone else.
Just another speed bump. The road "back home" is lined with 'em!!!
And if you just need some chocolate - let me know!!!

angela michelle said...

He's definitely going to walk in the door and yell, "Mom, I'm home!" I think you have every reason to stay on the optimistic side. And good for you on getting him the services he needs so soon.

Rebecca said...

I'd say you have a diagnosis, so you're well on your way. I'm with the others: stay positive!